Why as women do we compare, tear down, and marginalize each other? Today, while in the gym, I had a moment of comparison and it dawned on me we do this almost innately. Another girl came in and started her workout on the treadmill. I was in my wind down and doing my stretching. I immediately was trying to show how flexible I am and how zen I am. And then I realized what I was doing. I almost cried.
We immediately look to tear down or go into comparison when we see another female. We’re on guard and defensive when we should be loving, accepting, and supporting of each other. If we could show more appreciation and admiration and support and love to each other and ourselves – how much better would our days be?
How much better would our love of self be? How much more kind would our thoughts and words be?
I’ve wondered aloud numerous times about why we do this instead of supporting and loving ourselves and others. The most poignant and spot on answer I’ve received was from one of my closest male friends. Basically, men don’t see other men as better than them. This is why we have war because there is always something they can beat another man at. We tend to rank ourselves among other women and it’s essentially a slave mentality. Slaves were ranked to be sold. When the last few were left, they began trash talking and tearing each other down to make themselves look better. Sound familiar ladies?
Do we need to see the sentence “all women are created equal” in order to start treating each other that way?
We have to recognize that the system we are brought up in is broken. Working within the existing system and thinking we will have different results with the same actions is never going to happen. We have to take back the wheel and drive our own bus. We have to recognize how things are set to push us into this slave mentality. Everything we see and hear is geared to keep us living this way.
Drive your own bus! Shout it out “I’m driving the bus!” It’ll be hard and scary as hell as you take back the wheel and start to see this behavior and how it’s perpetuated. You’ll doubt yourself and think you’re absolutely nuts and you’ll probably cry and scream and want to beat the shit out of someone or some thing and you’ll want to curl up and let someone else take care of you, even if just for a minute. You have to realize and know and understand everything, and I mean everything, you need to succeed is already inside you. All the love, confidence, desire, beauty, drive, support, and sexy – it’s all in there.
Let’s stop tearing ourselves down and start loving and supporting ourselves and others. I double dog dare you to let your truth bloom.